Facebook Jokes
When facebook starts showing how many times you’ve visited someone’s profile, we’re all screwed …
Q: How ugly was my ex-girlfriend/boyfriend?
A: So ugly that Facebook banned her/his profile pic and sent her back to Myspace!
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Q: Did you hear about the website where you can find a collection of Twitter’s best jokes?
A: It’s called Facebook.
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Q: Why did John Connor lead the resistance against the machines?
A: Skynet refused to give John a Facebook friend request!
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Q: What do you call having your grandma on speed dial?
A: Instagram.
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Q: How bad was Facebook’s IPO offering?
A: Dick Cheney wants to take Mark Zuckerberg hunting!
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Q: Why is Facebook like Jail?
A: You have a profile picture, you sit around all day writing on walls, and you get poked by guys you don’t really know!
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Q: Why is Facebook a great site for loners?
A: Because it’s the only place where they can talk to a wall and not be considered an loser!
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Q: Why shouldn’t have Facebook paid $18 Billion dollars for Whatsapp?
A: They could’ve downloaded it for free!
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Q: Why did Mark Zuckerberg visit China?
A: To see the “Great Firewall”.
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Q: Why is Facebook like a refrigerator?
A: Because every few minutes you keep opening and closing it to see if there’s anything good in it!
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Q: Why is a survey, proving Facebook users have lower grades than non-users pointless?
A: Because Facebook users tell everyone how stupid they are with their status updates on a daily basis!
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Q: In addition to the social networking site Facebook where else can you find Mafia members?
A: “Controlling all the trash hauling in Second Life” Come to Myspace and Twitter my Yahoo Til’ I Google all over your Facebook.
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Q: When FaceBook, MySpace and Twitter merge into one super social networking company what will it be called?
A: They will call it “My Twit Face.”
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Q: What happened after hackers shut down Twitter for a day?
A: Twitterers were relegated to communicating the old fashioned way, through Facebook!
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Q: If Facebook is a loft in the city and Twitter is a house in the suburbs, what is Myspace?
A: A trailer park!
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Q: What did the twitterer say before committing suicide?
A: My Facebook can remarry!
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Q: Why did Atlanta Falcons lineman Quinn Ojinnaka post bail after getting into an altercation with his wife over facebook activity?
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A: Because he was afraid of going to jail and really being poked!
Q: Why shouldn’t you pay for a Classmates.com membership?
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A: Because Myspace and Facebook are free!
Q: What happened after Miss New Jersey, Amy Polumbo, lost her crown due to racy pics being leaked from her Facebook Account?
A: Amy Polumbo received a million friend requests!
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Q: What happened after the “Spam King” was charged with hacking in 500,000 facebook accounts and sending 27 millon unwanted messages?
A: He was convicted and sentenced 4 years of hard labor on Farmville!
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Q: Why is Germany threatening Facebook with legal action over its facial recognition software?
A: They say it fails to identify which faces are Jewish!
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